I was reminded that a friend’s birthday was on Wednesday. My heart shuttered a little. This dear woman celebrated her birthday in heaven this year. I’m sure she is living it up and being busy as a beaver on the other side. I am happy for her. However, a residual melancholy settled in that day as I thought again of our loss here.

The next day I received word that my boss and friend had passed away. Sadness descended, a little more heavily with this fresh loss. Over the next few days, I reflected on the footprints she left on my life over the years and how her passing would alter things.

These experiences reminded me of a lesson I learned years ago amidst the passing of a sister in our ward.

I did not know her, only of her. She lived just down the street. She and her husband were older, and I was busy raising my young children at the time. I had thoughts of a neighborly visit, but never acted on them other than maybe taking over a treat. If I remember correctly, her husband passed shortly before she did. Again I had thoughts of stopping by, but they came to not. When I learned of her funeral though, I made a point to attend.

It was an extremely small service. They had not lived in the area long so not many knew them. As I listened to some of the stories shared by her family, I was hit by a deep sense of loss. Oh how I had missed an opportunity to know a remarkable woman! I wished I had acted on those earlier nudges. I wondered what I would have learned from her. I still do.

While I have done better, I still let too many opportunities slip away. This past week, I’m grateful for the reminder of the blessings of connection. While it hurts so much when those ties are interrupted, I think it hurts less than the could-have-beens.

“The matter, therefore, of being a light is even more important in dark times. Our impact, for better or worse, on others is inevitable, but it is intended that we be a light and not just another shadow….The same God that placed that star in a precise orbit millennia before it appeared over Bethlehem in celebration of the birth of the Babe has given at least equal attention to placement of each of us in precise human orbits so that we may, if we will, illuminate the landscape of our individual lives, so that our light may not only lead others but warm them as well.” (emphasis added)

– Neal A. Maxwell, That My Family Should Partake (Deseret 1974), p. 86